I think this New Year is a great time for me. I talked to my kids last night; they are in Disney World with my family. I am turning in all of my non-essential Theater Provided Equipment (TPE) items and have everything else packed up and ready to ship home. Our end of tour briefs are beginning. Our shipping containers are now being packed for the long trip home. The pace is picking up quickly and I can smell my momma's beans and corn bread on the stove.
One thing I love about my kids is that they always make me laugh. They have my sense of humor. I miss their smiles, but will see them soon and that is enough encouragement for me now to keep my chin up. My son is excited about painting his room this summer and we decided to do a Cars theme. "Like the movie, not the thing you drive," he made clear.
My sister said they have grown up a lot this year; physically and emotionally. I am sad in a way. The combination of this war, my divorce and my ex's subsequent move a thousand miles away have taken me from my children's childhood memories. They will only have short, faint thoughts of me as they look back at this time in their lives and that hurts me more than I can say. Coming from a broken home with only short, faint memories of my own father, I desperately wanted to keep my children from experiencing the same.
They all sounded like they were having a great time and my daughter even sounded genuinely interested in talking to me this time. We had a long talk and I think she is excited about me coming to visit in a few weeks.
After talking with everyone, I was happy; I have gotten out of my funk. At this point I do care what day it is, here and back home, because I am almost out of here. I am anxious about getting home, being around my friends and family and wonder how much they have changed; how much I have.
Tomorrow begins a New Year. In all sense of the word, it is a new beginning for me.